Online dating consistently reminds me of The X-Files. I want to believe that the perfect freak is out there for me, but more often than not, my matches end up being soul-sucking vampires or starved werewolves. Either way, both The X-Files and online dating go great with sitting on the couch eating nachos while you’re stoned. And because the internet is the internet, it has given us 420-friendly dating apps such as 420 Singles, My420Mate, and High There! that allow us to skip right past the booze hounds to find a fellow devotee of goddess Mary Jane.
While I love being a Tinder Queen — or a “Tinderella,” if you will — as someone who prefers weed smoke-filled walks along the water over a booth at a bar, I decided to try the stoner-specific dating apps out. (Warning: Prepare for stock images of white people in VW vans). Enjoy my reviews of these strange, hazy tools — and if you’re a non-sociopathic elf, bigfoot, or fairy who enjoys Indicas and eating popcorn at the movies, find me on Twitter.
[Editor’s note: We reached out to all of the following apps for comment, yet at the time of writing, none responded. I was unable to reach 420 Singles, in specific, because their contact form froze.]
The username I selected for 420 Singles was “hotpotgoddess,” and they gave me “hotpotgoddes47,” which, wow, did you guys know there are 46 other hot pot goddesses out there? 420Singles is available both on your desktop and as a phone app. I ran into some bugs while trying to navigate their site, such as the issue with the contact form loading. I also had difficulty signing in on the mobile version after spending time with the desktop version. Am I bad at navigating technology or were the 420 Singles people super baked when they coded this bad boy? Let’s go with both.
Cons: Since I’ve already thrown some shade at 420 Singles for not being the most user-friendly, I’ll get the bad news out of the way before I dish the fun stuff (and there is indeed some very fun aspects to this dating app). I’d give the design and look of the app a B, but that’s on a weighted cannabis scale. It’s very green and their logo is a heart with a weed leaf inside. As a queer woman, while I was appreciative that 420 Singles provided a “bisexual” option, they could expand both their sexual orientation and gender identity options. However, I found this to be true across the board for other 420-friendly dating apps (and this is, it should be said, an issue with dating apps across the board). The legal weed world already has a bad rap for being hijacked by straight white dudes, so the more inclusivity anywhere and everywhere, the better.
There’s also not many users on 420 Singles. The app has a general chat where all users can get together at once, like the old school chat rooms you used to learn about sex and video games in as a child as your mom yelled at you to come up for dinner. As I type this there are only two participants in the general chat, so dating options are limited. After putting a request in the group chat for a 420-friendly babe near Brooklyn to hit up, one potential suitor messaged me privately. He asked if I wanted to meet up and smoke sometime. However his profile lacks a photo, which is always a red flag. Not necessarily because if someone doesn’t upload a photo it means they are unattractive, but to me, this implies laziness. Are you a bot? Prove yourself human by at least making your avatar a photo of your favorite bong.
Pros: While dating sites such as Match.com ask questions such as “What is your education level?” and “What is your religion?” filling out your profile on 420 Singles is so much more interesting. If you’re a cannabis enthusiast looking to have some goofs, I strongly advise creating a profile with 420 Singles simply for the “Fun Stuff” section. This includes answering questions such as your beliefs on ghosts, souls, UFOs, musical taste, video game experience, and obviously, strain and method of intake of choice. You can also use such filters to search for potential mates. Hoping to find my Mulder, I searched for a Pisces (I love Pisces) stoner in my area who also believed in UFOs, but unfortunately, no one showed up. If everyone who reads this joined 420 Singles, perhaps enough users would be available so that I could all bone down and fall in love with my ideal partner who not only also loves edibles but totally is in agreement with Tom DeLonge that aliens exist.
My 420 Mate
For the life of me, I cannot log back into my account with My 420 Mate. I swear to you I am entering their Captcha correctly. Again, I am willing to take the blame for this. Technology can get the best of me (other than saying yes to dates with vampires and werewolves I meet online). Or, their Captcha login system has a bug, and I am not the only user who experiences difficulties logging in. So sadly, my review of My 420 Mate is based on limited experience when I briefly successfully gained access upon initial sign in.
Pros: Like 420 Singles, filling out a profile on My 420 Mate is much more fun than your mainstream dating app. It’s less creative than 420 Singles (sadly there’s no option on UFO beliefs), but when asked to select your body type, there is a “Very Sexy” option which obviously I had to pick. They also provide “Slim Thick” as an option, which sounds like a chode, but for bodies and not penises. I’m not quite sure what they mean. Whatever! I think everyone should select the “very sexy” option because all bodies are beautiful.
Cons: When it comes to personality rather than appearance, 420 Singles uses a test akin to Myers Briggs. This isn’t a con in and of itself; the con is that I never got to learn mine (which I was quite curious about!) as the results page would not load no matter how many times I clicked refresh. The design of the site, while well-intentioned, reminds me more of an insurance company than a dating app meant to induce cannabis-fueled romance and sexual urges. In my limited time I was able to spend signed in, very few users were online. While I support their mission, I cannot recommend this dating app at this time (if you can even find a way to sign on).
High There! is a cannabis-friendly dating app that most closely resembles Tinder. It’s well-built, works consistently on mobile, and is easy to use. Just like with Tinder, the face of a potential match pops up on your phone. You can skip the people you aren’t interested in and if you like someone, there’s a nice blue button labeled “High There!” ready to be clicked. Your potential smoking and sex mate is then alerted, and if they dig you back, they’ll accept your invitation to chat.
Pros: You can one hundred percent find a date on High There! It works well, consistently, and there are plenty of people on there. It’s obviously the queen bee of 420-friendly dating apps. While there are a few quick questions about your interests, it’s basically Tinder for stoners. If you use Tinder, you’ll pick up High There! in no time. Not to brag, but within a week of using it, I have too many matches to even respond to. While you can do this on Tinder with someone whose profile makes it clear that they’re a stoner, the best upside to High There! Is that you have an automatic icebreaker. Simply ask, “What is your ideal 420-friendly date?” and within no time you’ll not only be conversing with your matches but planning and going on the aforementioned 420-friendly date.
Cons: The cons of High There! are the same as the pros. While I bitched about it above, there’s something very endearing about a stoner dating app that won’t load that also wants to know if you believe human beings have souls. The bug-riddled 420-friendly dating apps such as My 420 Mate and 420 Singles may not always let you sign into your account, but they contain a stoner nostalgia quality, like a High Times cover of a beautiful woman holding giant buds over her breasts. If you want an app that loads and will get you laid, download High There! If you want to spend an afternoon with a joint in one hand as the other types in a chat room about the existence of aliens with a stoner 1,000 miles away, stick with Tinder for dates, and enjoy 420 Singles for the experience.
Follow Sophie Saint Thomas on Twitter
Like a lot of the best stoner technology, our preferred method for finding your cannabis crush only sort of works.